August 7, 2013

• *034*

  
  
  

  Some things can’t and shouldn’t be fixed, especially broken relationships. It’s over for a reason. Deep down inside, you probably know what that reason is. A lot of the pain you’re experiencing is actually fear – fear of things being different, fear of never finding love again, fear of being alone, fear of falling for someone again, and getting hurt again. We are all afraid of the unknown. The unknown can be a scary thing, and sometimes it will cause you more pain, but other times, the unknown will turn out to be better than you could have ever imagined. You’ve just got to give it a chance

  
  

  Always take comfort in knowing that you are independent enough, that you don’t need to rely on anyone else for your own happiness

  
  

  I hate being in this position. I’m forcing myself to let go of the one person I need in my life. You’re the only thing that makes sense, but at the same time, the one thing that complicates me. I know that I’m better off without you, but I feel empty whenever I try to let go.

  
  

  I just wish the memories would fade. I wish the songs wouldn’t bring tears. And, I wish that his name would stop making my heart tremble. I want to forget. I need to forget. I deserve to forget. I have to forget

  
  

  And through all of this I’ve learned that sometimes things come to an end so that better things can fill up the holes left behind. And I’m figuring out that even though heartbreak is lonely and painful, it doesn’t last forever. So I suppose this is finding peace in the fact that I’ve figured out who I really am

  
  

  Sometimes we find someone who we think is the one. But looks can be deceiving; we hang on because we don’t want to find anyone else. He’s a sweet talker and a prince charming. Although, that doesn’t mean we were meant to be with them. There’s a whole world of people out there. It’s about time we explore

  
  

  Well, because sometimes you love someone but they might not be the right person for you. That takes some time to figure out

  
  

  What happens when someone breaks your heart? When someone breaks your heart, first you are shocked. Someone will say you are heartbroken and you examine the words break and heart and heartbroken and you immediately decide that it’s inaccurate. You feel pain in the region of your heart and you think it’s your heart breaking but one’s heart doesn’t really break, something else does – faith. You stop believing

  
  

  So here’s a piece of advice: let go when you’re hurting too much. Give up when love isn’t enough, and move on when things are not like before. For surely, there is someone out there who will love you even more

  
  

  I hate to say it, but shit really does happen. You just have to get over it. Beat the hell out of it by doing things that make you happy

  
  

  Failing is the first step to success, crying is the first step to happiness, and heartbreak is the first step to true love

  
  

  If it matters to you, work on it. If it doesn’t, don’t

  
  

  Everyday is a new beginning. Treat it that way. Stay away from what might have been, and look at what can be

  
  

  And everything you hoped would last just always becomes a part of your past

  
  

  Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere

  

  “You can do better. You deserve so much more.” In reality, you’re right. But sometimes when you love, you love the person for who they are despite what they have done wrong to you. That’s what love does to you. It’s not about who you deserve, it’s about whom you want, whom you need, and whom you love.

  I am so happy that xanga is still here – at least for another month. It just makes me sad that so many people no longer post here…makes me scared that xanga will never be as great as it was! Fingers crossed people come back!
  So I don’t normally do this but I am damn proud of myself for the weight that I have lost in the past year and the weight that I still want to lose. I also want to show ALL of you that it is possible to achieve your goal, if you only put your mind to it! I have a HORRIBLE obsession with food. I crave everything bad all the time and last year, I used to allow myself to have it constantly, as well as times throughout the year since last August. However, July 1st I decided that I was done with that way of life. I have been soo unhappy with my body for a really long time but wasn’t willing to give up shitty food to lose weight. When I graduated high school in 2008, I weighed 145 (which isn’t bad considering I am large framed but I’m only 5’2″ so it’s kinda bad). When I graduated college last May, 2013, I weighed 179 – my highest weight ever. Over the summer I lost weight and in August, one of my best friends and I took motivational pictures of each other so we could see ourselves how we really are. At the end of July, I retook pictures of myself to see how far I have come as well as what I still have to work on. July 1st I gave up junk food and signed up for the gym. I have been going 5-6 times a week for at least an hour. I have been eating so healthy, it’s crazy. I still get cravings but I don’t allow myself to have them! I just think about how I used to be and how I NEVER want to be there again. I am aware that this is a lifetime change and I am okay with that (: If anyone needs someone to talk to, someone to help them out with cravings and not giving in, just let me know. This new guy I have has helped keep me motivated and without him telling me no to everything I want, I wouldn’t have made it this month with the diet and gym. So message me if you want help, hints, tips or someone to just be there for you rooting you on (: Here goes nothing for this picture I put together. OH When this picture was taken, August 2012, I weighed probably 170 and right now when the second pictures in each one were taken, I am at 145 (: My goal weight is 130 but I have a lot of muscle!

  

  I hope this picture doesn’t gross people out and if it does…that’s not my problem. I know some doesn’t look like much but there is definitely a lot less fat on my arms, my back, my sides and my stomach. I’m not sure about how much I have lost in my thighs. I have lost 8 inches off my waist since May 2012 (: And I’m still going!!

  Anyways. My life has been busy between working fulltime and overtime as well as part time at a kennel filling in. I also go to the gym a lot. But I have been talking to a new guy, absolutely perfect for me (: But he lives 11 hours away /: September 1st, I am flying out to see him so fingers crossed it goes well because we haven’t seen each other since we met July 6th but we have talked constantly since! Other than that, I have nothing going on in my life! How is everyone who is still on here doing? 
  I guess that’s all! I hope I inspired some of you! (:
  Love you all <3

  • 8:35 pm
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